Daily Archives: February 5, 2010

>PR7EP4: Soup Is Good Food, But Not Always Good Fashion

>So, here we are in Week 4, and the challenge is to design for a real woman, as opposed to models, whom we all know are fake woman, i.e. men in drag. I kid. Well, maybe not.
The goal is to make a dress for the Campbell’s Soup Red Dress Gala for heart disease, and all of the women modeling the dresses have been impacted by heart disease. So, naturally, each of the designers broke out the tears, while most of the woman seemed happy to be alive. It took Anthony just a second to snap, “Quit the tears.” and then they were off.
As usual, there were some criteria for the challenge; it had to be red, naturally, and needed to incorporate some form of Campbell’s branding. For a moment, I pictured SethAaron actually using a branding iron on a model. I.Was.Terrified.
Now, I love me some soup, and, well, I love me some fashion, but soup fashion? It kinda made me long for Ping who would have made a dress in the shape of a soup can, with chicken noodle fringe.
Let’s rip:

SethAaron loved his client; she came up with great ideas, and he shared his thoughts. They came together for a cohesive team until Day 2 when the model said she wanted something Grecian? Grecian soup? Sounds delish, sprinkled with some Feta Cheese and Kalamata Olives, but…..where was I? The dress. So, SethAaron scraps his design and goes all goddess-y and drape-y, until Tim comes by and says he isn’t giving it the “Seth Aaron,” whatever that means. So, Seth scraps Greek, and comes up with this, much more flattering, SethAaron-y dress. And his model worked it; she wooooooooooorked it on the runway. She sashayed; she shantayed; she Minestroned. RuPaul would have been proud.
SethAaron was safe. And, in the interests of open dialogue, how cute was SethAaron dressed all plaid and suspendered and glasses and slicked back hair. I do so loves me a nerd.

The challenge was to make a gown for a gala, and Jonathan was one of the few that made an actual gown. It was gorgeous, and I even like the tiered thing-y going on. And, without going overboard, he incorporated the Campbell’s branding. It was pure fashion Vichyssoise.
Nicely done, and I thought it should have been Top Three instead of just safe.

Jay Nicholas went for Tomato Soup. You know it’s good for you, but you don’t really care for it. The design was lukewarm, at best, and could have used a liberal sprinkling of Saltines. And that poor model walked the runway as if she was an actual can of soup; was Jay Pinging his design? I mean, seriously, it left me Won Ton more.
Still, simple basic soup is always safe.

Janeane went for the classic Saloon Girl soup. The flouncy bits at the top, and the bubble hem with the slip of beige chiffon, was a little to Mild Mild West for me. And later on, they busted my boyfriend Jesse for the Campbell’s Soup brand flower, but they gave Janeane a pass. Seriously, this dress looks like a reject from Annie Get Your Mulligatawney, that old MGM musical about the soup wars of the 1880s.
Janeane goes safe, while I throw up a little Chowder.

Emilio went simple. Too simple. This doesn’t say gala. This doesn’t say gown, This says, I was sitting around my house eating soup, and then realized I wanted a grilled cheese but had no bread so i threw on this old thing and ran down to the Piggly Wiggly. It’s cute, but it’s dull, and it made me think that the model was pregnant or spent too much time at the All-You-Can-Eat-Soup-Buffet. I was Borscht by it.
Safe, but so sorry Emilio, I no likee.

This is Ben’s Ode To All Things Campbell. And he used the gold from the label which was nice to see. I like the like logo trim along the slit, but the dress is a little too Campbell’s Cream of, well, Cream. It’s kind of dull, and makes me wonder: which one is Ben?
Oh, yeah, he’s middle of the road, safe Ben.

Now, for me, Anthony came through on this. It’s pretty, though it doesn’t say Gala Gown. It says more Gala Gown Secretary who forgot to get the programs from the printer so she’s running in quick to drop them off. It’s very pretty; moves well; the model looks fab-u-lous, but it doesn’t say party, unless it’s an office party on the Campbell’s Soup loading dock.
Anthony is safe.

Jesse, who I have a wee crush on whenever SethAaron isn’t looking nerdy, went Bottom Three, so I was worried; Bottom.Three. Though sounds like a party, but I digress.
Jesse had Pinged his way to the bottom last week, and I was a’scurred. The dress itself is actually quite pretty, and even Nina said she loved the neckline, but why oh why he chose to pair it with what looks like a canvas shorty coat is a mystery. I think Jesse opened up a whole can of Campbell’s Worm Soup with this mess. Kors called it a “majorette” looking thing, and they all thought it looked like a costume. Now, I didn’t get that because I saw some other costume-y looking mother effin’ dressing doing the runway stroll last night. Yes. I’m lookin’ at you, Mila!
But, Jesse is safe because of the dress, not because of the jacket.

Now, this is Anna. And, from the looks of this thing, Anna doesn’t like soup. The dress makes her model look like a linebacker, and that beige fabric, well, if it was meant to disappear, she should have made the entire dress out of it. I seriously thought the woman had forgotten to remove her, um, underthings, and they were poking out of the top of the dress. Kors said it was a bad cut, and that it looked like a bag. Bag.Of.Soup.
Anna, however, is safe.

Jesus. Jesus, Jesus. Even the real Baby Jeebus couldn’t have saved you. He could have walked on Vegetable Beef and you still would have been sent packing. As Kors said, Jesus took every tacky idea imaginable and then made a dress, and then Gazpacho’d some rhinestone straps on it as :::cough cough::: an accent. I mean, it shines, it has Campbell’s Logo Pleats along the sides, it’s short, it has bejeweled straps. Jesus needs to edit.
Instead, he ate it. Buh-bye Jesus. Four weeks of crap, and near crap, doesn’t get you to Bryant Park, honey.

Mila. Now, I’ll get to you and this costume-y looking salute to Campbell’s Soup’n’Stars. The judges loved it. Loved it, and I kept thinking she looks like she should be a parade float. I like the top, and the Campbell’s logo trim detail. I like the star at her waist. But that giant mother effin’ star on the side scares Jesus right off the stage. It looked tacky, and costume-y and too literal to me, and yet Mila is Top Three.
I think she is a Russian Spy and they’re tyring to goad her into a false sense of security while Moose and Squirrel make a boat out of soup cans and flee the country safely.
I think too much.
I think Mila should have been Bottom Three.

This is Little Mila, I mean, Maya and her salute to soup. I think she got a little too into the draping thing; she seemed to be Chicken Consumee’d–see what I did there? I meant consumed, but, since it’s about soup, I said consumee….I’ll stop.
The judges kinda likee; they get that she did a play on Healthy Heart with the bodice, and she did use the gold from the label, but the draping looks a little cheap; Scarlet O’Hara did better and there was a war on when she was on PR.
But Little Mila is safe.

Amy, then, is the winner of the Soup Is Good For You challenge. I loved her dress. It flowed and flirted. It was fun and elegant. It’s frothy, it’s…it’s…it’s Broth’y. It looked like liquid soup….wait….soup is liquid. Whatever. It was pretty, and actually looked gala and gown.
Amy gets immunized for next weeks challenge.
See, soup is good for you.

There isn’t much more to say about it, or the show, except, I think they should separate the Mila’s and the Maya’s; they are beginning to walk alike and talk alike and act alike and dress alike, what a crazy pair. And Jesse needs to step it up, and SethAaron needs to stick with nerdy, and Anthony, well, he needs to stay being Anthony because that girl cracks me up.
Fashion Assassin. Out.
Way out.

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Filed under Bob, Lifetime, Project Runway, Reality TV, TV

>Quote Of The Day: Sarah Silverman

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In 2007, Sarah Silverman said she would not marry then-boyfriend Jimmy Kimmel until all Americans could legally marry. In an interview with The Advocate [HERE] she reiterated her position brilliantly:

“Absolutely. Not only that, but lately I’ve been really annoyed by any liberal person getting married who says they stand for gay rights. How can anyone in good conscience get married right now? How is that different than joining a country club that doesn’t allow Jews or blacks?

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Filed under LGBT, Sarah Silverman

>Dirty Tricks And Scary Pictures

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There was a big kerfuffle down in Florida over a recent adoption case. see, it was the case of a one-year-old boy and the gay couple who are his parents. It got all the religious wingnuts in a snit. You know, gay folks and babies; indoctrination; molestation; fabulous sense of fashion; good sense of the right powertool for the right job.

In this case though, the judge ruled that the boy who had been living with his foster parents was “happy and thriving” and that a permanent adoption made perfect sense–if adoption was legal in Florida. The judge’s ruling seemed like another step toward that goal; one day the two foster foster mommies might become the adoptive mommies of the little boy.

But the wingnuts, who don’t have anything to do with the child, who never saw the foster parents with the child, want the boy removed from the home because his parents are lesbians. They, Orlando’s Florida Family Policy Council, called the judges ruling “arrogant judicial activism” in an alert sent out to its members last week. Oh, and they didn’t just call the gay couple names and rant and rave the usual anti-gay propaganda. No, they included the picture of the adoptive parents [see above] in their literature.

That photograph of a strange, androgynous-looking duo was so bizarre that it was almost impossible to tell if the couple was male or female. And it lead some to people to wonder how a judge could ever place a young child with such strange parents.

Except the judge didn’t.

The abnormal-looking couple that the Policy Council chose to illustrate this story is not the same couple granted the right to adopt the child. The foster parents are Vanessa Alenier and her partner, Melanie Leon, and they are pictured to the right.

The picture that the Policy Council chose was a grotesque caricature, a scare tactic of horrible looking women who, of course, who molest a young boy, mistreat a young boy, harm a young boy. This is how groups like the Florida Family Policy Council see gay couples; as monsters. As it’s how they want the world to see us, too. It’s how they’ll work to keep us from marriage equality or adoption rights, from getting fired for being gay, losing our homes for being gay.

How do you fight people who paint you as a monster?

You come out; you show who you really are, and you call out people like the Florida Family Policy Council for they dirty dealing.

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Filed under Florida, Florida Family Policy Council, LGBT, LGBT Adoption, LGBT Rights

>The Lovely Jenny Needs To Accept Her Share Of The Blame

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Just when you think the, ahem, fairytale marriage of Mark and Jenny Sanford couldn’t become more of a joke, well, then, Jenny talks some more. See, it seems that when the lovely Jenny married Mark The Hiker, he insisted, insisted, that they leave out the part about marital fidelity in their vows.

And she said, “Duh, okay.”

So, how then is she now playing the victim, the wounded party to her adulterer husband? Didn’t he make it quite clear on that day some twenty years ago that he was not going to be faithful? And yet she went through with the ceremony, and stayed with him, and then only decided to leave him once his steamy, sultry emails to his Argentinean Booty Call were made public.

But, again, I have to wonder, he told you on your wedding day that he wasn’t going to be faithful? So, why say “I do” when Marky clearly was more of a “I don’t”? Was it the chance to be Missus Political Wife, and all the power and prestige that might entail? Did you envision yourself at a White House function as the First Lady so often that you sold out for an adulterer?

Those are questions I’d like to hear the lovely Jenny answer. And she might [though, call me a cynic, but I doubt it] when she is interviewed by Barbara Walter’s on 20/20 tonight–the same day as her book, Staying True, billed as an “inspirational memoir”, is released. Jenny will discuss their courtship, their marriage, his affair, and how she felt about Mark Sanford’s reluctance to pledge fidelity was probably a case of cold feet.

Uh, not cold feet, but more along the lines of I’d like to try out some other feet other than just yours, lovely Jenny.

Jenny Sanford; “It bothered me to some extent, but . . . we were very young; we were in love….I questioned it, but I got past it . . . along with other doubts that I had.”

So, Jenny, you left your cheating husband because you felt he was not a good husband or partner, and wanted to teach your boys about love and respect and marriage. And yet, what you’ve taught your sons is that it’s okay to settle; it’s fine to enter into a marriage when you are doubting the marriage before it even begins, and your husband to be tells you he will not ever be faithful.

You say your son’s world has been tuned upside down by what their father has done, and then you admit to giving him carte blanche to cheat? “It is something that is now a part of their lives. … They’re not happy. They’re not proud. … It just ripped me up, to see them reading these e-mails, and to see them have to grow up so fast.”

It’s hard to fathom who’s done the most harm to your children. Both you, lovely Jenny, and Mark, are a pathetic example of heterosexual marriage, the sanctity of marriage, and of parenting.

And you can write all you want about blame, but a great deal of it lands at your feet for signing off on such a “marriage”.

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Filed under Jenny Sanford, Mark Sanford, South Carolina