Monthly Archives: April 2011

>I Ain’t One To Gossip, But…..

>I know. She’s an idiot. I mean, she stashes cocaine in her vah-jay-jay. ALLEGEDLY.

But now, little Miss Paris Hilton is being blasted by Sarah Shahi, “star” of something called ‘Fairly Legal’, as being the “worst driver ever” because Paris ALLEGEDLY almost hit Shahi.
Trouble is, Paris says she wasn’;t driving anywhere that day: “I was so shocked when I read that, too. First of all, I wasn’t even driving that day. I just came back from Vegas with my boyfriend–and we were home relaxing. I hadn’t even been in the car that day. I literally came with a driver from the airport went to my house.”
Paris then lamented that perhaps it was someone who just looked like her.
Seriously? There’s more than one vacuous blond bimbo with the IQ of soap and a cooch full of coke driving around LA.
Well……..maybe.
Then  Paris goes on and on crying about the team of Paris look-a-likes “who do it for a living….always doing things and I’m getting blamed for it.”
Marcia! Marcia! Marcia! 
Sarah Shahi won’t back down, though, and ranted on Twitter–because how else do people communicate these days–about Hilton:
“Paris Hilton- worst driver ever. Almost hit me, then ran a stop sign.what if there was a kid around the corner, you dumb b–ch.”
Shahi then called Paris a “horrible excuse for a human being” and a “blonde piece of sh-t”.
Okay, so where’s the rant? 

Because no one noticed, Kate Hudson announced she’s engaged to Muse rocker, and her upcoming baby daddy, Matt Bellamy on The Today Show this week.

During a live interview with Matt Lauer, where Kate kept swatting her left hand through the air, Lauer finally broke down and mentioned the rock on her ring finger.
Hudson laughed: “It just happened a week ago, I’m so glad you noticed,. I haven’t really announced it and I felt like the announcing thing feels so silly, and I was just waiting for someone to notice.”
Which is why I’ve been batting my hand around like I’m hailing a freakin’ cab before someone would ask me!!!!
Then Kate got all coy, refusing to discuss wedding dates or arrangements.
My guess is that she’ll show up on Wendy Williams in a wedding dress and wait for Wendy to ‘notice’ it.
Just sayin’.

Talk about a fright.

Last October, Daniel Radcliffe admits he was terrified to hear Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling announce to Oprah that she might write another Harry Potter book, or two. Although Rowling has always insisted that she was done with seven books on the Junior Wizard, she said, “But you never know!”
Radcliffe was heard screaming, Every time I try to get out, they pull me back in!!!
After a team of paramedics revived him Radcliffe says he texted Rowling so her could clarify her comments. He won’t say what she texted back, but I think it was along the lines of How did you get this number?
But it may take Rowling a long time to write books eight through forty-seven, and by the time they come to be filmed, Radcliffe will be too old to play a boy wizard.
At least that’s what he hopes.

Glee spoilers! Glee spoilers!

And, no, Bret Easton Ellis hasn’t been asked to write an episode.
But Mister Shue, Matthew Morrison, is talking about upcoming episodes, including the one where someone on the show will die.
Holy Moldavia Batman!
You mean someone more important that the Warbler mascot bird, Pavarotti?
Morrison says: “Somebody’s dying. Obviously I’m not going to tell you who it is, but it’s no-one that you would probably expect. The episode right before the finale is called ‘Funeral’. We were actually at a funeral home yesterday, shooting all day. It was a very taxing day.”
Someone.Dies.On.Glee?
What.Will.They.Sing?
Who do you think it is?

Talk about everything old being new again. or every old movie being made new again.
Former California Grope-enator, Arnold Schwarzenegger, is being shopped around Hollywood like a whore with a coke stash.

And Arnie is said to want to star in…..ANOTHER…..remake of ‘The Terminator’. I guess he meant it when he said, “I’ll be Bach.”
And I thought he meant Johann Sebastian. Now that’s a movie worth seeing.
Unfortunately there is no screenwriter attached yet, because most screenwriters are like, Um, this has been done, to death, and back again. But a director, ah, that’s  a whore, er, horse of a different color has expressed interest. Apparently, Justin Lin, who is responsible for ‘Fast Five’–the fifth installment of The Fast and The Furious, because four weren’t enough–is getting wooed to helm the project.
Who’s up for seeing Ah-nold back onscreen in Terminator: Rise Of The Man-Boobs?

Poor Lindsay.
After being sent back to the big house, er, the Lynwood Correctional Facility–where she was incarcerated for the unbelievable amount of five hours–Lohan is now crying that she’s being punished because she’s a celebrity.

Car thief? Jewel thief? Drug addict? Kidnapper?
Oh, yeah, how unfair.
A source close to Lindsay–and by source I mean Mama Dina who has a news crew permanently stationed in her home lest she go five minutes without publicity–says, “She is being treated differently from everyone else because she is famous. We were all in shock when she was forced to return to jail just to make an example out of her. It’s not right. Especially when she is working so hard to live a healthy life.”
Last week, a judge ruled that Lindsay, who has been accused of stealing a necklace, was in violation of probation and was jailed for five hours before someone–a drug dealer, I’m thinking, because she’s his best client–got her out.
Dina, er, the source, adds, “She is innocent and can’t understand what is going on. She didn’t steal any necklace and will be found innocent. It’s obvious this is only happening because she is famous and anyone that thinks celebrities get away with stuff or let off will think again after seeing this.”
Hey Lindsay, listen up you utter moron: if you were Lindsay Lohan, working at the Forever 21 store in Dayton, Ohio, and had done all of the things you’ve done in your short stint of adulthood, you’d have been locked away for years.
Years.
So do not play this Poor me crap.
And do not make me go to my manicurist and have my Fuck You nail reapplied.
Please. Go to jail. Do not pass go. Do not talk, whine, cry.
You’re over.


Rob Lowe, or, as he’s known by his porn name, Raw Blow, must have a pretty selective memory. See, in his new auto-biography, ‘Stories I Only Tell My Friends,’ he conveniently glosses over his six-year relationship, engagement to, and loss of a child with, actress Melissa Gilbert.

Lucky for him Michael Landon isn’t alive. He’s take Lowe out behind the barn for a whoopin’.
In her tell-all, ‘Prairie Tale,’ Gilbert revealed she’d had three nose jobs by age 20, struggled with drugs and alcohol, and then wrote page after page about her love affair with Rob Lowe, including losing his child.
Rob Lowe, on the other hand, in his book, dishes about his Hollywood bromances with Charlie Sheen and Sean Penn, dining out with Chris Farley and many more important things than a  six-year relationship. Of course, he also makes scant mention of his infamous–because of the underage girls–sex tape.
In Melissa’s book she mentions Rob Lowe 77 times.
In Lowe’s book, he mentions Gilbert 4 times.
Guess the relationship and the miscarriage meant more to her?
She writes on and on that she “fell instantly, hopelessly and stupidly in love” with him, then wallows in the anguish of losing him. He talks about how, when Gilbert’s mom tried to keep them apart, he began spending more time with Charlie Sheen and his brother, Emilio Estevez. He makes absolutely no mention of the length and intensity of their relationship, their brief engagement and Melissa’s miscarriage.
I guess it meant more to her than to him. He had buddies to drink with and underage girls to screw.
Just sayin’.

Bon Jovi rocker Richie Sambora has checked himself into rehab. Again.

And not just for rocking the Jane Fonda in Klute wig. But, for, among other things, like, um, sobriety “issues”. A source–and by source, I mean Denise Richards, because she’s the go-to source for all things Sambora or Sheen–says, “Richie recently has been drinking too much, and wants to get his life together.”
He also checked himself into rehab for exhaustion.
Exhaustion rehab? Seriously?
Is there a rehab for everything now, because I may need a Bravo rehab one of these days. Or a Logo rehab. Top Chef: Rehab.
But Sambora, who’s been on tour with Bon Jovi, says he needs time to regroup. And take a nap. ALLEGEDLY.
A friend–Hi Denise–says: “Richie has had a busy year. I think this was a culmination of all the things that overloaded his life and finally he realized he needed to take care of himself.”
This isn’t Sambora’s first time at the rehab rodeo. He made his first appearance at the career boosting rehabbing Cirque Lodge back in 2007, right after he divorced his wife, Heather Locklear, and broke up with his girlfriend, Denise Richards.
Maybe he needs a Blonde Starlet rehab?


This guy is a pig.
He thinks he might be the next Robert DeNiro, when he more like the next Robert DeLusional. But self-titled Hollywood bad boy, and wannabe movie star, Alex Pettyfer, has given an interview where he discusses everything, from a sad, sick tattoo, to his hatred for LA.

The star–hee hee, I giggle at that…..star….–of ‘I Am Number Four’–remember when it was in theaters for an hour or so?–gave a candid interview to VMAN magazine where he revealed that he has a tattoo, right above his crotch that says, “Thank You”.
I imagine the proper tattoo should have said, “That isn’t a toothpick, it’s my dick.”
Pettyfer, ever the gentleman, says he got the tattoo, “in case I forget to say it.”
Oh, honey, you don’t have to say Thank you. Just leave the money on the nightstand. Or the passenger seat. Or the next urinal.
Pettyfer, who was once considered, by himself mostly, to be on the Hollywood fast-track to stardom, until his head got ginormous–making his penis appear even smaller–now says, “I really don’t give a s**t about any of that. I wish I had some interesting stories about living in L.A., but mostly I just do my work and then go home. Being an actor is like being in prison. You go, you serve your time, you try and replicate Johnny Depp’s career and then you move to Paris.”
Oh, honey, you’re no Johnny Depp. He has talent.
And it seems that Hollywood, like me, has developed a distaste for Pettyfer. After rumors of his ALLEGED erratic behavior, most bigwigs in Hollywood are steering clear of Pettyfer.
Unless they’re wearing a Hazmat suit.

Looks like ‘Two and a Half Men’ will be back in the fall, and it will be Sheen-less.
Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.

‘Men’ creator Chuck Lorre is ALLEGEDLY working on a reboot of the I-have-no-idea-why-it’s-so-popular sitcom, and Sheen is out, though Jon Cryer, who without this would have no career whatsoever, is in.
Winning!
Cryer has ALLEGEDLY been presented with a plan that would focus on his character, Alan, and a new character–someone Sheen-like, but not Sheen–who has yet to be cast. Lorre has ALLEGEDLY presented  his idea to a few Hollywood players, and the network and studio are aware of his intention to overhaul the series.
Though no actor has emerged as the frontrunner to replace Sheen–both Rob Lowe and John Stamos were rumored–the network has yet to schedule the return of ‘Two and a Half Men.’
But CBS could be eying it as a mid-season launch.
Or it, like Sheen, could just go away.

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Filed under Alex Pettyfer, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Charlie Sheen, Daniel Radcliffe, Glee, Kate Hudson, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton Is A Moron, Richie Sambora, Rob Lowe

>This One’s For Miss Truvy

>Miss Truvy, who has Sean of Just A Jeep Guy, wrapped around her paw, as it should be, wanted to be part of this whole “Caturday” stuff. So Sean kindly obliged [see her adorbale face HERE] and then Miss Truvy asked other Blogger Dogs to follow suit for her Pawfect Saturday and Ozzo was only to happy to help:

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Filed under Dogs, Ozzo, Pets

>Just A Thought: Just For Giggles

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Filed under Just A Thought, Just For Giggles

>New Crushes

>Well, lately there have been some mens that I just can’t get off of my mind, for a variety of reasons, I assure you. So, I thought, being the generous gay that I am, that I would share them with you.
Let’s roll:

Blair Underwood. Say.No.More.

Brandon Jay McLaren. He plays Bennett
Ahmed on AMC’s The Killing.

Prince Carl Philip of Sweden. It begs the
question: Prince William who?

Chef George Mendes of Top Chef Masters.
Such a sweet face, and he can cook.

Curtis Stone, host of Top Chef Masters. He has
 a bit of a Jay Leno chin, but, oy,that accent.

Francois Arnaud. He is Cesare Borgia on
Showtime’s The Borgia’s, and he smolders.

Phillip Winchester AKA Leontes on Starz’
Camelot.Many times he is nude.
And it’s spectacular.

Scott McGillivray of HGTV’s Income
Property. What can I say, I love a
man with a tool belt.



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Filed under Blair Underwood, Brandon Jay McLaren, Curtis Stone, Francois Arnaud, George Mendes, Hot Men, John Phillips, Prince Carl Philip, Scott McGillivray, Winchester

>I Didn’t Say It……..

>Christina Aguilera, on her Superbowl/National Anthem flub:

“I took in the moment a little bit too much. Shoot me for appreciating the moment but here I am at the Super Bowl…singing for a team and in front of the world. And remembering what it was like to be that young and look where I made it now. {but] that night I knew, I just made myself a Trivial Pursuit question…In 2011 what female singer, ya know, flubbed the lyrics. It’s just insane. But I have a really good laugh about it and you get over things. You get back up again and you just prove to yourself and to everyone you’re that much stronger.”

This makes me wonder if she’s talking about the ‘flub,’ or her ALLEGED new fondness for the drink. I mean, I loves me some Christina, but she’s looking a little vodka-bloated lately.

Kara DioGuardi, on quitting, or being fired from, ‘American Idol’:

“I called them after I saw reports about the show and they said now that Ellen is leaving it’s put everything up in the air because now we need to replace two people so we don’t know what’s going on. So I asked if I was fired and they said “no,” so I said well last week we were talking about auditions, am I definitely doing the show? And they said, “We can’t say that for sure but you’re definitely not fired.” I thought I’m not going to hang around and wait to see what happens, so I sent them a letter asking them to release me from their contract which they would not do until they sorted it all out. I think the reality is that the panel was not set up until the very end.”

Um, Kara, when you ask someone if you are working, and they respond with a “We can’t say that for sure….” Honey, you’re fired. M’kay?

Rachel Maddow, on coming out, especially for people in the news business:

“I’m sure other people in the business have considered reasons why they’re doing what they’re doing, but I do think that if you’re gay you have a responsibility to come out.”

I agree completely.
Staying closeted, for whatever reason, whether you want to protect your privacy, or keep your private life private, or however you phrase it, still smacks of a little self-loathing and shame to me.
Plus, the more people that come out, the more people will come to realize that being gay isn’t so different from being straight.
Except for that whole fabulousness part. 


Larry Kramer, on his ‘problem’ with the younger generation of gay men:

“I don’t know why so many gay men don’t want to know their history. I don’t know why they turned their back on the older generation as if they don’t want to have anything to do with them. I would like us to get beyond that….Sometimes when I go to schools, kids say that they’re taught to be non-confrontational or non-participatory now, almost like it’s not cool to have opinions and express them, which is sad. I hope we’re coming out of all that.” 

You can’t ever know where you’re going, if you don’t know where you’ve been, and who fought for you to be right where you are.
We learn about the history of the world, the history of America, we need to know the history of gay people, and how they struggled and fought and lived and died so we could be here today. 


Kelly McGillis, on her public coming out:

“Fundamentally, I was just tired of lying about who I am. I’ve reached a point where my kids are grown, they’re out of the house, they no longer have to be concerned that their friends, their friends’ families, will put them in compromising emotional situations because of my sexual preference. That was a big concern of mine because, unfortunately, a lot of people are not very tolerant. I got to a certain age and I didn’t give a s— anymore.” 

This is the shame I was talking about. By staying closeted “for her kids” Kelly McGillis fed into that mythology that being gay is something scary or bad or different.
And do not get me started on her calling being gay her ‘preference’.
Just proves that even gay people can say idiotic things.
Which proves we are more like straight people that many straight people think.
Except, again, for that whole fabulousness part. 


Rick Santorum, on denying gay rights, er, privileges:

“They have the right to be able to — employment. I don’t know what you mean by rights. What I’m talking about are privileges. Privileges of marriage, privileges of government benefits is a different thing than basic rights to live their lives as they well should and can as free Americans.” 

So, Mister Frothy Mix, things we should be happy with less-than.
See, people like Santorum think of the LGBT community as a ‘they,’ and he believes that that ‘they’ shouldn’t be treated like the rest of  ‘us’.
Think again you sanctimonious prig. 


Mel Gibson, on his bad image as a homophobe, anti-Semite, misogynist:

“I’ve never treated anyone badly or in a discriminatory way based on their gender, race, religion or sexuality — period. I don’t blame some people for thinking that though, from the garbage they heard on those leaked tapes, which have been edited. You have to put it all in the proper context of being in an irrationally, heated discussion at the height of a breakdown, trying to get out of a really unhealthy relationship. It’s one terribly, awful moment in time, said to one person, in the span of one day and doesn’t represent what I truly believe or how I’ve treated people my entire life.” 

Yeah, I know he’s talking about his taped telephone rants, but, um, Melvin? You delusional fuck?
Do you not remember your anti-Semitic rant when you were arrested for being a boozehound?
Do you not remember calling a female office ‘sugar tits’?
You can’t rewrite history, jackass.
You’re an anti-Semitic, misogynistic, homophobe.
Deal with it. 


GaGa, on calling herself a loser in her new HBO special:

“Well, in that moment I was very excited and nervous. That is a huge benchmark moment in my life. I’m 25 years old. I was asked to play Madison Square Garden. Sold out 5 nights and quite frankly it’s very overwhelming. Do I feel like a loser sometimes? Yes, of course I do. We all feel like losers sometimes.” 

Oh, yes, I’m sure when you have teams of minions carrying you around in an egg, or ask Cher to hold your meat purse, you feel like a loser.
And I’m sure when millions line up to see you in concert you feel like a dork.
Pity? Party of one. 


Tracy Morgan, on Charlie Sheen:

“Charlie Sheen ain’t funny to me. I think that’s a train wreck and I feel bad for his two little kids because they’re the bodies being pulled out of the train wreck. What’s going to happen to them? But everybody thinks it’s a joke….While this a–hole is going on stage making a fool of himself his kids are going to suffer and don’t even know it because this is a cycle of abuse.” 

Tracy Morgan is kind of a nut-job, too.
So, when a nut-job calls you out for being crazy, maybe you ought to step away from the crack pipe, and the whores, and listen. 


Oklahoma’s gun-totin’, wingnut, homophobe, racist, Sally Kern, on banning affirmative action:

“We have a high percentage of blacks in prison and that’s tragic, but are they in prison just because they are black or because they don’t want to study as hard in school? I’ve taught school, and I saw a lot of people of color who didn’t study hard because they said the government would take care of them.”

Wow.
She doesn’t even try to hide the fact that she’s a racist bitch.
Um, Sally, i know a lot of white folks who didn’t study in school either, and I’m thinking you’re probably one of them. 


Lawrence O’Donnell, on why he invited looney-tunes Birther, Orly Taitz, on his show, right before he kicked her off:

“She’s crazy. I invited a crazy person on the show to see if a crazy person faced with the thing that the crazy person was trying to get for the two and a half years could say something responsive, something human to the document that was released today.” 

Now, this falls under the category of “Told You So.”
I like O’Donnell, but did he really think a wingnut lunatic like Taitz would ever cop to being wrong?
It’s the new GOP model, You lie and when you get called out on your lie you just keep talking.
Palin, Gingrich, Bachmann, and Trump are all doing it.

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Filed under Christina Aguilera, Kara Dioguardi, Kelly McGillis, Lady GaGa, Larry Kramer, Lawrence O'Donnell, Mel Gibson, Rachel Maddow, Rick Santorum, Tracy Morgan

>Just For Giggles

>This just in from Twunty McSlore at Love Me, Love My Blog:


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Filed under Donald Trump, Just For Giggles

>Just For Giggles: THIS Is A GOP Presidential Hopeful

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Filed under Asshat, Republican, Wingnut, YouTube